Friday 12 August 2011

One Year Ago Today

One year ago today a 36 week pregnant me went in for one more growth scan and found out that my son had no heartbeat. I had no idea anything was wrong and could swear I had just felt him move. But I was wrong, they told me he had been gone for at least a few days.

That was the moment that my life fell apart.

I have spent the past year trying to pick up the pieces.




32 comments:

  1. Sending you love from a new subscriber and new member of that dreaded club. It's a month on Sunday for me... 4 weeks yesterday.

    I can barely see the pieces to pick up.

    Much love to you..

    http://www.hesperasgarden.com

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm so terribly sorry. I think I *knew* Hope was dead, though I never wanted to believe it. I knew I could no longer feel her moving. But to have not seen it coming at all must have really added to the shock and trauma. I so wish your little boy was and that this wasn't your reality.
    All my love to you.
    xo

    ReplyDelete
  3. Thinking of you today. Would love to participate in the balloon release but we are out of town at a wedding and can't even seem to find a grocery store. :( Can't wait to see all of the pics though! Hugs to you on this and every day. I can't believe it's been a year.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Thinking of you today, and your beautiful baby boy. I am so sorry that today is a day of sadness and heartbreak instead of one of joy and celebration.

    Much love to you,
    Jo

    ReplyDelete
  5. Sending Love and Hope to you today.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I am so sorry. Praying for you and your family today.

    ReplyDelete
  7. xox

    Sending you love and squishy hugs. I'll be thinking about you and your family.

    ReplyDelete
  8. i feel blessed to have been a part of your life, even under such sad circumstance.

    i will be thinking of you, your husband, and your son today.

    <3

    ReplyDelete
  9. Many hugs to you mama. I hope you find a way to make the day special.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Please know that I have been thinking about you since the past few days. Much love to you and your beautiful beautiful baby boy.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I'm so sorry you're missing your baby boy. Thinking of you and sending love.

    ReplyDelete
  12. I'm sorry for your loss, I cannot image the grief you must feel from losing him so late in your pregnancy.
    following from boost my blog fridays
    http://www.theordinaryaunt.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  13. Thinking of you today, and will be tomorrow too. Please know that I really want to release a balloon, but can't face the balloon shop again so soon.Looking forward to seeing all of the photos though. x

    ReplyDelete
  14. Wow. Hang in there :)

    Stopping by from the Friday hops to say hello.
    You can visit me at
    http://poshonabudget.com/2011/08/friday-friend-connect-3.html

    Have a great day!
    POSH

    ReplyDelete
  15. I'm so sorry that today isn't just any day, just a day that you were pregnant with your son. Thinking of you today, and tomorrow.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Sending you so much love. <3

    ReplyDelete
  17. Ugh. So sorry THIS is the day your world stopped. I kind of feel "lucky" (wrong word, but you know) that we got the news on one day and then Addi was born the next. That way I can hate the day she died, but love the day she was born...maybe it's sort of the same for you...?Hoping tomorrow and today go easy on you.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Thinking of you and your family today...

    ReplyDelete
  19. So sorry.. You are in my thoughts..
    Hello there.. Officially following you from boost my blog hop today.. Lovely blog.. Awesome posts.. Settling in to read some more.. ;)) Hope you can stop by my blog sometime.. I'm Marilyn from http://theartsygirlconnection.blogspot.com/ .. Ciao :))

    ReplyDelete
  20. Sending you all my love. Thinking of you.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Sending you light and love.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Have been thinking about you all week. Sending you love and peace.

    (And WTF is with people visiting from blog hops and not taking off the stupid happy comments?! So insensitive.)

    ReplyDelete
  23. Sending lots of love your way.......xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  24. I'm a new follower too. I'll be thinking of you. Would you accept a candle lighting in your son's honor instead? I am so terribly sorry for your loss.

    ReplyDelete
  25. The moment my life fell apart, then trying to put the pieces together again. I'm sending you lots of comfort right now and tomorrow for your son's birthday. Hoping that this next year brings more healing - thinking of you

    ReplyDelete
  26. Sending lots of love to you today, and thinking of you and your little boy. xo

    ReplyDelete
  27. Sending you lots of love as you remember your sweet son. Lots of love...

    ReplyDelete
  28. Sending lots of love your way~

    ReplyDelete
  29. Thinking of you today. Sending you and your husband comfort greetings from the Netherlands.

    ReplyDelete
  30. You have been on my mind all wk.

    ReplyDelete
  31. I'm sorry I'm so late in posting this, but I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am that you've had to endure the past year without your little one. All the balloon pictures are just wonderful and I hope it brings a bit of comfort to know how many of us there are out there who remember your boy. xx

    ReplyDelete