I am a planner. I like to know things. I like to have information. That way I can make plans. I'm not saying that my plans always work out.... take my last pregnancy for example.... but making the plans makes me happy. So I really don't like the fact that I don't know if my little Frosty is a girl or a boy.
When I was pregnant with our son we knew at 13 weeks. This is because due to The Hubby and I both being carriers for cystic fibrosis, we opted to do a CVS to make sure he would not carry the disease. When you do a CVS they can also tell you the sex of the baby. No guessing, no playing peeping Tom with the ultrasound to identify girl or boy bits, no chance of error. You know 100% that your baby is either XX or XY. Done!
This time since we used donor eggs we don't need to worry about cystic fibrosis (phew). It also means Frosty showed low risk for downs syndrome (thank you 20-something year old donor eggs). So this time we are opting not to do a CVS or an Amnio. I don't want to take any unnecessary risks with our little Frosty.
All good, except that it means I have to wait until 20 weeks to find out if we have a "Frosty" or a "Frostina" in here.
I have been feeling a boy vibe up until now. The last time I also felt boy and I was right. But then last night I had a dream about Frosty. She had been born and she was a girl. She was super cute with brown hair and brown eyes just like mine. I remember thinking that was funny since both our egg donor and The Hubby have brown hair and green eyes.
I am now wondering if I want to change my prediction from boy to girl?? I know it's all just a fun game we play with ourselves, this predicting. I know we won't know until we play peek-a-boo at 20 weeks. But I am starting to wonder if indeed I am having a girl.
I should also stress that I have no preference whatsoever. After what I've been through I just want a baby born alive and healthy.
Dealing with the loss of a child is never easy, but it's even more difficult when you are an expat living far from home. Life will never be "normal" again and so now the challenge is to find my new normal. I am now back in the USA and the proud parent of two daughters, born using two different egg donors. "Frostina" and "Olea" are the loves of my life and I feel so grateful for the amazing women who donated their eggs and made my family possible.
The wait to find out is frustrating! You sound like me, I wanted no surprises. The anxiety of IF was enough for me, thanks :) With my daughter they still couldn't give me 100% which sex she was going in to the hospital. I brought a girl outfit and a boy outfit with me. They were leaning 75% girl, but that wasn't definitive enough for me.
ReplyDeleteHow are you feeling? The old wives say that you feel worse when pregnant w a girl. I'm not sure how true it is, but I felt much more energetic and less nauseous with my boys, and there was two of them! My daughter made me feel terrible and very tired.
I had no preference either time to sex. I feel so much worse this time with a boy!
ReplyDeleteFirst, I'm glad that you don't have to do CVS or an amnio. I can see why you wanted to do it with your last pregnancy, but it's one less thing to worry about with this one.
ReplyDeleteSecond, it must be hard to wait to find out the sex, especially after knowing so early last time. My mom was telling me that at the time she had me, women didn't get routine u/s so people always found out at birth.
Only 4 more weeks until you get to 20 weeks. I am going to bet it's a girl (if you are taking bets).
Whether boy or girl I wish you a happy healthy take home baby. I know the wait must be hard though.
ReplyDeleteWow, I didn't know with those tests they could determine the gender too. I'm with ya on no unnecessary testing being done. Well I hope you get what your heart has been longing for- a healthy live baby. hugs-
ReplyDeleteFelicia
I've not had the chance to wait for the peek-a-boo session at 20 weeks, but I know (from following my friends and their pregnancies) that I go crazy waiting to find out the sex of the baby.
ReplyDeleteNot knowing is absolutely the worst possible thing ever. Even in perfect circumstances. But when you have a tragedy like yours to consider, the wait must be just shy of unbearable. Whatever the gender, I very much wish a healthy baby for you.
ReplyDeleteI dreamed of both my children's faces before they were born so I'd say you are having a girl! Can u feel her moving yet? Xx
ReplyDeleteI also like to plan things ahead of time.
ReplyDeleteAnd I must say I'm glad you don't have to do unnecesary testing.
I was dead wrong it turns out in my instincts - I thought it was a girl and it turned out to be a boy. I look forwad to hearing more from you!
The predictions are interesting. But you never know and I want to find out as well, don't need the surprise so many seems to like.
ReplyDeleteBoy....Girl? you need to add an update.
ReplyDeleteI always loved the surprise! I didn't find out either time. Thanks for Rewinding.
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