Saturday, 19 March 2011

Friends and Date Nights

As I have mentioned before, I find it much easier to write when I'm sad. I don't always want to write about sad things though. So I'm happy to be participating in a blog hop hosted by Natasha at My Angel Baby... Aiden William. In this hop we talk about the things that have made us happy this week.

So what's made me happy this week?

Friendships- Both new and old.
I have found that some of my friendships have changed since losing my son.  Although I'm lucky that most of my close friends have stuck around and are very supportive.

I have found some acquaintances no longer seem comfortable being stuck in a one-on-one conversation with me. I suppose that's not a huge surprise. What has been a great surprise is to see how some of my old friendships have strengthened in ways I didn't expect.

I have one friend in particular who I always liked but we were never really close. She reached out to me in my darkest hour. She has her own struggles she is dealing with as well. Not having to do with the death of a baby, but very painful struggles nonetheless.

We have bonded over our pain. We share our stories in a way that maybe we don't do with the people we see all the time. I'm not saying that all we do is cry when we're together. But we do cry, and we talk about our deepest fears and obstacles, and we laugh, and drink wine, and have fun.. I think we both feel safe talking about anything when we're together. Then we go back to our "usual" friends and live our normal "putting on our happy face" lives. I don't see her all the time, but whenever I do I walk away feeling loved.

I have also had the chance to meet a fellow Baby Loss Mom. We connected via Twitter. We are both expats living here in London so we are having to navigate this journey of grief and loss without the benefit of having our families close by. I found out she lived close by so we met for breakfast this week. It was so nice to be able to talk to someone in real life who gets it. We talked about our babies and how we are trying to move forward in our lives. I haven't participated in any support groups yet so this was one of the first times I've been able to talk to someone who walks in my shoes. I am so glad we connected, and I hope we will do it again soon. She lost her precious daughter Pippa in February and has just started her own blog. Here's a link if you want to read more about her Missing Pippa.

Date Nights
The hubby and I are going out for dinner tonight. It may not seem like a big deal, but I really enjoy when we get out and do things together. After almost 13 years of marriage it's nice to get dressed up and leave the house on a Saturday night once in a while. We usually don't get out on the weekends unless we've made plans with friends. So a dinner just with the two of us will be nice. Now I've just got to figure out what to wear.  


  1. Hope you have a great date night with your hubby. They are rare and quite precious here, as well!

  2. Date nights are so important. My husband and I don't go out much either, but it sure is nice when we have the chance. Glad you got to go out with your hubby this week.

  3. I miss date night... we haven't been out for dinner just the 2 of us for sooo long but have dinner for our anniversary organised for this week - can't wait. Date nights are very precious.... hope you have a great night xoxo

  4. it is nice to have a support system during one of the most horrific times in a person's life. i've lost a lot of friends since losing my baby boy, but the ones i have gained i am so thankful for.

    glad you and your hubby were able to have some time together.

  5. I'm so glad you were able to connect with another blm. I have found it to be a very humbling and beautiful experience.