Well I'm officially on my way. I started on birth control pills today which is the first step in the process.
They put me on birth control pills to synch my cycle with the egg donor's. That way we can start taking all our medications in synch. We do this so that when she is ready for egg retrieval, my body is ready to hold the embryos. It's very complicated and I'm sure part of the reason that things like this are so expensive.
I don't have my complete schedule just yet, but taking this first step feels like we're finally getting this thing started. And that's a good feeling.
Dealing with the loss of a child is never easy, but it's even more difficult when you are an expat living far from home. Life will never be "normal" again and so now the challenge is to find my new normal. I am now back in the USA and the proud parent of two daughters, born using two different egg donors. "Frostina" and "Olea" are the loves of my life and I feel so grateful for the amazing women who donated their eggs and made my family possible.
The first step is always so huge! Sending you love and positive energy as you open your heart to trying again.
ReplyDeleteWishing you hope and luck and patience on this journey to a new little sibling!
ReplyDeleteHoping so much for a little brother or sister.
ReplyDeleteSo exciting! Thinking of and praying for you on this journey!
ReplyDeleteWow. This is happening. Hoping hoping hoping.
ReplyDeleteOh my god. Again, already! It feels like "already" because we weren't that far behind you with our donor cycle, our girl also born in June 2012, and we have decided not to go that route again. Too stressful; feels like we got our girl by the skin of our teeth with only one embryo, the subchorionic hemorrhage and low-ish fluid resulting in more bedrest than one would like, I practically didn't move the whole 9 months anyway, 9 days in the NICU...
ReplyDeleteBut I'm envious. Envious that you feel good enough about it all to try again. Envious that you have a very solid chance for a sibling. Soon. So soon...
There are so many BLMs pregnant again after their first rainbows (not to mention all the other regular women in various parts of my life). It has surprised me to find its very nearly as hard as it used to be. That I'm still incredibly pissed at not having the chance at having my own child. That the one I had died.
I realize choosing not to go the donor route again makes not having another shot my own fault and my own doing. I just...wish I had more confidence in my body, in Brad's guys, in the quality of our donor's eggs (who we would use again because the donor pool is waaaay low here and it would take forever to come up in the cue)...the whole thing.
I agree. Looks do matter. If you're a person that really wanted a biological child, especially. Our daughter looks nothing like me either, and the older she gets, the more of the donor I see in her (her father too, but wow - the donor...since we know the donor and see pictures of her kids regularly, it's pretty easy to distinguish). And it HURTS. It hurts deep and it hurts wide, that this spectacular little being is not of me. She grew and flourished in me, and still does, but she is not OF me. And there is no denying genetics.
So I give you hand a tight "I get that" squeeze and a solid "good for you" in choosing a donor that checks all the boxes. *sigh*, the birth control. The shots. The shots that continue if a pregnancy ensues! Not for the faint of heart, this.
Good luck...will be waiting for news! :)
Whoa, big steps! Wishing and hoping for you, so much <3
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