tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post6189160543263356943..comments2024-02-24T09:40:19.257+00:00Comments on Finding My New Normal: Are You There New Normal? I'm Still Trying To Find You.My New Normalhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03482513767849843084noreply@blogger.comBlogger29125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-61577886968758862572011-12-04T04:01:29.567+00:002011-12-04T04:01:29.567+00:00So sad. Horrible. There are certain songs and cert...So sad. Horrible. There are certain songs and certain sweets I cannot ever eat that trigger grief for me - I can totally empathise, and my heart goes out to you. (I suffered a late loss in nearly exactly the same circumstances as you.)<br /><br />Thank you for linking up via the Weekend Rewind.Diminishing Lucyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02072304081006798910noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-46149417262449527462011-12-03T14:27:49.978+00:002011-12-03T14:27:49.978+00:00wow, what an incredibly hard time you have been th...wow, what an incredibly hard time you have been through. I hope you are closer to your 'new normal' now xxxCharishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04660480515664679559noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-86025064190948100202011-12-03T08:15:57.301+00:002011-12-03T08:15:57.301+00:00So sad... So many challenges...So sad... So many challenges...tinsenpuphttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11955496156384131307noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-61999668874960560332011-12-03T02:30:53.856+00:002011-12-03T02:30:53.856+00:00Oh dear, so sad, so sad. Hello from the rewind, o...Oh dear, so sad, so sad. Hello from the rewind, off to see how you are travelling these days.Seana Smithhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14225191303428309442noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-56426865779837474392011-12-03T01:23:34.572+00:002011-12-03T01:23:34.572+00:00I'm so sorry... You know what, this is your ne...I'm so sorry... You know what, this is your new normal. The ups, the downs, the tears over chilli. Hopefully, time will even the ups and the downs. Some of the triggers will probably be always be there. I'm still trying to come to terms with my new normal and it's been three years. Hang in there...Princess Katehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17428403547798565896noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-6109354383193955022011-12-02T22:44:29.976+00:002011-12-02T22:44:29.976+00:00Grief is such an all-consuming thing. There will a...Grief is such an all-consuming thing. There will always be triggers and at least chilli can be avoided. xMaxabellahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15761220164069379437noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-59121777765249077652011-12-02T21:44:11.397+00:002011-12-02T21:44:11.397+00:00Oh so sad. I know things have got better for you. ...Oh so sad. I know things have got better for you. AM going to check latest posts to see how you're travelling.<br /><br />Visiting via the REwind.allison taithttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00762529258195877400noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-85073862694361500712011-12-02T11:34:39.807+00:002011-12-02T11:34:39.807+00:00My heart breaks for you. Forget chilli. There...My heart breaks for you. Forget chilli. There's many other dishes you can make. Sending a big hug...Mrs Catchhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00451875041973822074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-10542724853166370782011-09-20T22:46:56.134+01:002011-09-20T22:46:56.134+01:00makes total sense to me. i couldn't make the c...makes total sense to me. i couldn't make the chili either. i don't know how to get back to normal or what that normal looks like. my heart aches for you. sending tear stained hugs your way.Camhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07904566668570109875noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-1755130587935274272011-09-20T17:25:57.258+01:002011-09-20T17:25:57.258+01:00*hugs* mama... nothing can be normal after the los...*hugs* mama... nothing can be normal after the loss of a child. I hope you can still take joy in each day though to find something to smile about.Amandahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03084921069178121116noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-30393459261529207862011-08-24T14:27:44.609+01:002011-08-24T14:27:44.609+01:00Oh I get that. I get it all.
And I will be relea...Oh I get that. I get it all.<br /><br /><br />And I will be releasing the balloon too. There is a stupid thing that is happening...but still!St Elsewherehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08074672268757885766noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-8916361298149534912011-08-24T05:11:59.185+01:002011-08-24T05:11:59.185+01:00That is quite a trigger mamma... and I completely ...That is quite a trigger mamma... and I completely understand. Sending you a big hug tonight...Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-31756126369061339412011-08-23T22:35:59.348+01:002011-08-23T22:35:59.348+01:00Yes, I get it. Grief has a strange way of giving ...Yes, I get it. Grief has a strange way of giving huge significance to things that may only make sense to the person grieving. For me, it also seems to sneak up when least expected and blindside me. Pisses me off that I can feel so out of control over my feelings 10 months later. <br /><br />Just wanted to give you a big cyber hug today.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-29414561383486974332011-08-23T20:23:28.014+01:002011-08-23T20:23:28.014+01:00It's really not about the chilli I guess, but ...It's really not about the chilli I guess, but how normal things which ones brought some joy to us has changed now. How they all seem abnormal...<br /><br />I think you have the gift to live through what you write. When I read your post, I could actually visualize that huge pot of chilli in the fridge facing you when you returned home after the scan. I have many images like this, making appearances in my mind, of the day my baby was born..of the day he died..<br /><br />Am sure all blms have their own images. But I think I can never write them down like you did.little vitu's momhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01278601777604552101noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-84732850747299188672011-08-23T08:43:31.774+01:002011-08-23T08:43:31.774+01:00This post breaks my heart. I'll be sending all...This post breaks my heart. I'll be sending all my prayers and hugs your way from now on when I eat chili.Lindseyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03806744763433165902noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-57973391539065115242011-08-23T07:35:30.486+01:002011-08-23T07:35:30.486+01:00That you've been able to express your feelings...That you've been able to express your feelings about chili, dinner guests and the need for sunglasses in public tells me that you are definitely finding your new normal. You know yourself and your limits; you've found them. Take care.Linda A.https://www.blogger.com/profile/06667283310675139549noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-51049721125473332452011-08-23T05:58:09.956+01:002011-08-23T05:58:09.956+01:00Could not have written this better myself. Thinkin...Could not have written this better myself. Thinking of you and please let me know if your new normal lands in your lap at any point in time. I still owe you a picture, I haven't forgotten and will get it sent to you soon.Missyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17215595176820577303noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-7428283437391365932011-08-23T05:21:04.379+01:002011-08-23T05:21:04.379+01:00SIgh. I'm glad you're not making the chili...SIgh. I'm glad you're not making the chili. Cry away, and let the trigger be just what it is. You don't have to change it or move past it. Just let it be and tell chili to fuck off.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-83398843557100880702011-08-23T04:59:26.307+01:002011-08-23T04:59:26.307+01:00Hey, you know what, this sound totally "norma...Hey, you know what, this sound totally "normal" to me. That's what happens in post-traumatic stress. I have a dress in my closet I don't know whether to donate or burn or bury or save... It's the one I was wearing the day I found out she died. The one I still picture myself standing in the entrance to the hospital. So it's still there in my closet. There's a movie I can probably never see again. A restaurant I will not got to again. Etc. Sounds about normal to me...Erinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09283913162296498312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-1285001057322062562011-08-23T03:17:14.971+01:002011-08-23T03:17:14.971+01:00I balled my eyes out today when the doctors office...I balled my eyes out today when the doctors office never called me back, the didn't call me back when I was having trouble the week I lost the twins. It triggered me and put me right back into that place when I felt helpless. I understand you.Desiraehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01465543582379822389noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-49628000576953632692011-08-23T02:34:07.744+01:002011-08-23T02:34:07.744+01:00I understand.
Daffodils are like poison to me. I...I understand.<br /><br />Daffodils are like poison to me. I hate those things.<br /><br />Fuck you, April.Rocciehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16240177887229400836noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-15691743825913953642011-08-23T00:29:44.293+01:002011-08-23T00:29:44.293+01:00I just found you through "For the Love of Blo...I just found you through "For the Love of Blogs." Even though I've never lost a baby of my own, my pastor's wife lost hers. They named him Joseph Abel, & it inspired me to write these lyrics: I wish you were able to be here, able to cry & scream, able to laugh & sing. I wish you were able, able to crawl & walk, able to hug & talk. Though some may forget you, I never will 'cause I know that you are able still. And when it seems like I'm missing all you would achieve, I think of Heaven, & I believe you are able. There's another verse, but you get the picture. I could send you a copy of it if you'd like. Anyway, I know it's not really the same at all, but I experienced many of the same things since my parents' divorce...tear triggers, a "new normal." I love your openess & descriptions of your struggles. In some small way, it's helped me with my own. Thanks.Song of Joyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02470761623245839882noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-69956115988609333932011-08-22T23:00:31.131+01:002011-08-22T23:00:31.131+01:00I totally hate how things so ordinary are now trig...I totally hate how things so ordinary are now triggers and sadness. There are just so many of them. Friggin' sucks.<br /><br />But I agree with the other ladies... it's not just the chili.B. Wilson @ Windy {City} Wilsonshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17479551028143520755noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-41456322153079560712011-08-22T22:14:27.963+01:002011-08-22T22:14:27.963+01:00No, it's definitely not JUST the chili. I imag...No, it's definitely not JUST the chili. I imagine that certain things that happened around the time of your son's death will always be a trigger. In time you may make the chili while shedding a tear or two, and maybe even someday you will just be melancholy when you make it, but right now stepping away from the chili pot sounds like the sane thing to do :)<br /><br /> Thinking of you, and wishing that you didn't have to make your way through life with a 'new' normal.Chickenpighttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09442755180328605920noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6831856940051820911.post-40953189367395527042011-08-22T21:44:18.049+01:002011-08-22T21:44:18.049+01:00It wasn't just about the chili....sending ligh...It wasn't just about the chili....sending light and love.Ameliahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07115154893444857726noreply@blogger.com